I recently read an article on LinkedIn entitled “Employees leave Managers and not the Company”. This triggered a very deep thought in me – Did this happen to me and what did I do about it?I am not going to sugar coat it and say my professional experience was akin to walking on a red carpet littered with rose petals. I had been through multiple situations, as many of you probably have, and my solutions to some of them are listed below. I am positive that each of you have your own personal techniques for dealing with the following situations. Feel free to comment or share your own thoughts, ideas and advice which will help many others out there. But for now, these worked for me:

• I consistently put myself in the other person’s shoes or my manager’s role when a conflict occurred and imagined making the decision that would make me and everyone else on the team happy – easier said than done. Still, this technique is beneficial for both an individual’s personal and professional development goals.
• I revisit the conflict or topics of discussion a few hours later and then multiple times over the next few days – my solution each time is different and better than the previous one. Since an individual goes through a phase I like to call the “Epiphany Phase”, or the “Moment of Realization Phase”, once personal and professional priorities are taken into consideration. Once this phase occurs, you move on in a few days, sometimes even in a few hours, and feel as if it never happened. This is how strong an epiphany can be on a person’s heart and soul. I was always of the mindset that happiness is a choice, not a result. You decide each morning if you are going to be happy, or angry. The choice is yours.
• I can honestly admit that I never once thought about leaving the company I loved. Even when things got really, really ugly. I am not one to flee from hardship. I tackle it head on. Much like a marriage, work requires…well, work…to keep it afloat. I did attempt internal upwards growth on two occasions, but the career stars in the heavens were not aligned properly. It never materialized. But I still never strayed outside the company. I remained positive. Again, until the very end.

A few other things to consider from both an Employee and Manager Perspective:

• We must first remind ourselves that every manager is in actuality an employee of the company themselves, and every manager has a manager, too!
• Negative feedback is to be taken with a grain of salt and we must place a positive spin on it which can be a career development goal.
• Managers listen and mentor employees like they were managing and mentoring children at home (sometimes you have to repeat few things for them to take hold!), as they will be your mirror image and future managers.
• Imagine yourself in your manager’s shoes. Perhaps then you will appreciate and be a little happier about your job
• You, as an employee, must always remember that a manager has an entire team to think and worry about. You are just one person. They might have hundreds of employees to look after. Don’t always make it about you
• An extreme amount of patience is required by both parties, since not all solutions are successful upon the first attempt and might have to be re-visited; either party might very well be in the wrong.

There are those that might disagree with the above set of theories, logic and possible solutions. For argument’s sake, let’s try to agree and forge a new path (and heed the advice) and leave because of a manager. Can an employee ever be guaranteed the same/new/more difficult situations will not arise with a new company and manager? In life, unfortunately, there are no guarantees. Especially at work.

You can run from a problem for a while, but once you stop running and start dealing with the problem, both parties will benefit and learn. Eventually, you will master the problem-solving characteristics in yourself.

Finally, agree the situation does occur where you leave because of your manager. This occurs only when you are ready to take a manager’s role and want it badly enough. Since you cannot replace your manager, you instead have to look outside your job where your service is required and needed.

Again, I would deeply encourage you to share your own personal experiences, since you might be helping others a great help by offering an ear or lending a shoulder for support. There is comfort in numbers; knowing you are not the only one going through the trials and tribulations at work. We are all in this together.